There is an unspoken assumption that men in nightclubs are devoid of any standards or taste when it comes to ‘picking up’. You could weigh three hundred pounds, have broken teeth, an eye patch, a facial scar, no hair and a penis nestled underneath your knickers and you’d still find a guy willing to go home with you. Indeed, when most men approach an attractive young woman in a club, they can expect to be met with an attitude that is 1/3rd cynicism, 1/3rd weariness, and 1/3rd disgust. They already know what you’re after, and they’re not interested.
The prevailing assumption being that the only reason men go out is in order to get laid. There is of course some rational to this. Many of the men I have spoken to regard clubbing as a sort of sexual safari, where beautiful young bodies are to be stalked as if they were prey to be successfully captured. Of course in this case they are being captured with suggestive dance moves and seductive words, rather than with nets and rifles.
However, as a member of the coarser sex, I like to think that we should not all be tarred with the assumptions that we are nothing but potential rapists. Some of us, believe it or not, do like to dance without worrying whether it casts doubts over our sexuality. In fact, the older I get the more distinctively unattractive I find the idea of locking mouths with a complete stranger on the dance floor becomes. Only the most desperate, drunk, or sex crazed of us usually descend to this level. It is not fit for civilized society, even clubbing society. There are conditions and exceptions of course, I may reverse my opinion of mouth locking when I find myself sharing the dance floor with Emma Watson, but until that day comes I am prepared to adhere to my double standard.
As with my own exceptions, there are some things that many men find distinctly unattractive in the club. As I am not so old fashioned to believe that that it is only men who go out at night hoping to play a game of legs in the air, I suppose the ladies reading this can choose to pay heed or not to an insider’s perspective. Not that women have ever needed much help getting laid.
For many men there is something instinctively depressing about a female who is legless with liquor. I’ve had this argument with other women who detect a double standard in men’s willingness to tolerate themselves and their male compadres on the piss, while displaying condemnation for women when they stumble over furniture and projectile vomit into public toilets. And, indeed, I am unable to find a rational for why this should be so. The heart has its reasons that reason knows not of. One of the reasons may relate to sexual ethics and consensus. The last thing any man wants to feel is that they are being manipulative or advantageous when they take a woman to bed. Because it is wrong, and also because men very often want to feel as if they are wanted by their partner. They are not wholly beneath a little bit of liquid encouragement for this attitude. However, a 2o something that staggers around like they’re auditioning to be an extra on The Walking Dead may be too much reality for most would be seducers to withstand.
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