Not just ‘death as a fact of existence’, but like in-your-face, your life ending in the immediate future death. To be exact on December 21 thanks to the Mayan Apocalypse.
You might remember ‘Holy Shit Everybody Is Going To Die’ from other pop culture epidemics such as, ‘Swine Flu!’, ‘The Y2K Bug’, ‘TERRORISTS. - Featuring George Bush’, ‘Bird Flu!’ ‘GLOBAL WARMING - Featuring Al Gore’ and ‘THE OBESITY EPIDEMIC - brought to you by everyone, everywhere’. You also may have noticed that, although death was certain, you haven’t actually died yet. Weird huh?
Unlike the Apocalypse all these other causes of the end of the world didn’t have all these legit and fucking terrifying natural disasters to convince us that hey, maybe we really did screw it up. Water conservation ain’t gonna save us now.
If the Mayan calendar is on the money then this is one of the top 5 shittest things that could happen to the human race as a collective. I am sure I join many others in the opinion that I don’t want to die. I haven’t even watched Avatar yet, I have unfinished business on this earth.
But you know que sera and all that and every cloud has a silver lining, so here’s this one’s - THE END OF THE WORLD IS GOING TO GET YOU HOOKZ.
Yes. Imminent death brings people together because a) no one wants to die alone and b) people lose all inhibitions and disobey their better judgement because there are no consequences in a human race that does not exist. Instigating mortality salience in the opposite sex, particularly women, increases your chances of scoring with them by, like a million. All it takes is a simple, “So, do you think the world will really end?”
If you require more tips on how to pick up during/preceding an apocalypse please refer to any zombie movie or this Pepsi Max ad:
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