So apparently boys love to play dress ups too! Especially when it’s clubbing time so you get to pull all the ladies, and maybe show some of the boys who’s boss, with your super stylin outfits. Oh you go getters.
Although sometimes, boys, you need to be a bit more selective when choosing your ensemble inspiration because at times it looks like you just turned on 7mate and decided to pretend you are one of the people from that show about hillybillys that live in a swamp or something. And then there are some of you who get it sort of right and I want to give you a gold sticker for your efforts but you seem to look as if you loose your way in the forest of celebrity fashion.
You are all beautiful on the inside.
1. Pauly from Fat Pizza
Pauly is funny and thats why he gets chicks. But since you don’t and have never appeared on a well known, and frequently aired comical TV show denoting your humorous personality, I can’t tell if you’re funny or not just by looking at you. You look like a tool who works in some sort of ethnic food establishment. If you give me your phone number I will use it to order a pizza. Nothing more.
2. AFL/Rugby players who are currently on the field in their uniforms.
I get this connotation guys make. Like, ‘if I dress like I’m sporty, maybe people will think I am really, really sporty and good at sport.’ Maybe they would. But if you really were as sporty and fit as you would have me believe, why would you wear your sports shorts any other time than that which requires them to play sport? A real athlete would know that. Also, these items of clothing are generally prone to get especially dirty. Put clean clothes on for the club.
3. The guy next to you.
Safety in numbers is a good rule of thumb, except for when you are trying to dress yourself. Oh, so the other member of your outfit tag team is your best mate? Thats cute. My mum dresses my baby brother like that. Did your mums dress you as well?
4. Zac Efron
I love you for knowing who Zac Efron is and trying to dress like him - really, you mean so well boys and I do not mean to discourage you from progress. A for effort. But maybe, look at what Zac Effron wears in something other than High School Musical because this baseball top in clubs craze is becoming a bit of an issue. Or, maybe, just by a different sort of top. No, not a different colour baseball top, a different one all together. That way you and your friends will stop looking like you are wearing a uniform.
5. Gok
I also love you if you know who Gok is and can we please arrange a shopping date?
See what I did there? If you dress like Gok, which some of you excessive hipsters are starting to do these days, girls are not going to want you to take them to bed, they are going to want you to take them to your bedroom and let them go through your closet so they can borrow your clothes for next weekend. My gaydar is generally pretty good, but this sort of thing has thrown a real spanner in the works and is forcing me to question everybody. It’s not natural.
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