First and foremost, be a woman. If this proves to be a challenge for you, refer to point one. If that doesn’t help, there is a considerable chance that you could be the one who is supposed to be buying the drinks. Please note, the only failsafe way to get yourself free drinks is to get yourself a boyfriend. If this is not possible, the following steps may suffice:
Yet another inaugural fail in our series of articles focusing of the alcohol induced stupidity that happens on any good night out on the town. If you want to submit a video, post in on YouTube (as you do) and send the link to matt(at)barsandnightclubs.com.au. Enjoy!
If you are one of those strutting alpha male John Hamm types or the kind of guy who can pass off “wanna fingerbang?” as a pick up line, then stop reading. This article is for the meek, because blessed are we, at least when it comes to discussing our favourite Simpsons writers (John Swartzwelder!).
Mums are the best ever, am I right?
Yes, I am. Mums are the ones who sit with you when you are sick and gross and make you tea.
Mother’s Day is coming up and if you’re anything like me, you have no idea what your mum might want to do. Mother’s Day should be about bonding, and what’s a better way to bond then to let your mum into your world and take her for drinks at your local bar or tavern.
The following are tried and tested ways to get yourself kicked out of clubs and bars. In case any prospective employers happen across this article, the following have never happened to me - they happened to my, er, friend.
Some people, it comes naturally. Others… well, a bit of alcohol always helps loosen them up. There’s always some classic dancers that make me have a little giggle on the dance floor. Are you one of them?
When you think about it, nightclubs are where we are at our most animalistic. The d-floor is littered with sweaty, pheromone oozing bodies, gyrating in time with the rhythmic and primal vibrations of drum and bass. We actually go to them in order to attract a mate with the girls showing off a lot of skin and some of the guys acting downright predatory.
So you and your ex divided friends and gave back clothes and wished to never see each other again. Then, oh-oh, suddenly you’re in the same club. Terror. Is it a bad dream? Should I leave? Wait, I’m not leaving. They should be the one to leave. Let’s just pretend they don’t exist and we didn’t notice them but secretly try to show them up. Arrrghh.
Yet another inaugural fail in our series of articles focusing of the alcohol induced stupidity that happens on any good night out on the town. If you want to submit a video, post in on YouTube (as you do) and send the link to matt(at)barsandnightclubs.com.au. Enjoy!