We’ve heard it all before - usually from our parents or those who think they know better – “you’ll never meet a nice boy/girl at a nightclub.” According to ‘these people’, if we’re looking to find our soul mate, we’ll have better luck finding them attending a friend’s barbie, at the gym, or even trawling the isles of our local supermarket; but NEVER, EVER at nightclubs (which poses the question: “if there are no quality individuals out at bars or clubs then how come I’m there???”) Anyway, I have gone off on a tangent and this is actually not the topic for this opinion piece (haha I had you fooled didn’t I!). However what I want to explore is whether long-lasting friendships can be formed at bars or nightclubs.
Now, I’m not talking about the BFF you made bonding over shoes while waiting in line while for the toilets, or the guy who’s suddenly your best mate after he finds out your girlfriend has a bevy of hot friends. I’m talking true-blue, spiritually connected, platonic friendships. Could it be possible that 30 years on, 2 mates will look back and laugh/reminisce about they met that night out at the club?
Personally, I can’t think of any true friendships I’ve formed while out on the piss. This, coupled with the fact that I can’t seem to find anything regarding this topic on the Internet makes it even more of a mystery to me. In the hundreds of articles of clubbing, venues and friendship making, there is nothing on this topic; compared to the numerous articles on venue reviews and picking up guys/girls in nightclubs (I should know, I’ve written a few!) Perhaps the reason for this is that it’s just too difficult to meet a life-long companion when we’re out clubbing – I mean we’re not really being ourselves are we? More like a trashier, drunker version of ourselves.
So what is the secret to making friends? The short answer is to be a friend yourself. People who surround you on a daily basis are not obligated to become friends- you must make a conscious effort to be receptive to the needs of others. From our earliest childhood experiences we can well remember sensing the relative ‘friendliness’ of those around us. Before any new friendship can be formed, both parties must display a level of interest that goes beyond individual needs. This is the basic cornerstone of friend making.
This didn’t really help. I do understand how this relates to making friends in general; I just think it’s probably a bit too heavy for a night out on the town - I mean we don’t really go to bars or clubs thinking “I’m going to make some more friends tonight!”. Lest I am back at square one and still pondering the question “Can you form long-lasting friendships in bars and nightclubs?” In my opinion, I’m not sure it is possible - but I still hold out hope
Hit me up if you’ve ever had success with this; I look forward to your comments and opinions.
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