The toilet. Everyone has to go sometime, and many people have certain phobias and practices regarding going to the toilet. I’m not talking about the obvious like wiping your bum after giving birth to Mr Hankey, but I’ve heard so many people say how they don’t use public toilets or toilets at work and hold on until they get home (how do they hold it all in for that long?!). Imagine how these people feel about nightclub toilets!
Think about how many people have used them all in just one night. People are drunk out of their minds, so guys won’t aim their willies properly, resulting in piss all over the seats! This is not cool or funny. It’s gross. Before people start saying, ‘But I was pissed at the time, I couldn’t aim for shit’ (two toiletry puns right there!), you are 18+ years old, therefore you know how to aim your flow of piss properly, so this is just inconsiderate and rude. This sort of thing makes me “crack the shits” (he he). Fortunately for guys, we can just stand up when peeing, but for girls, they got to squat over, or heaven forbid, actually sit on one of these!
However, pee is not the only human liquid spread around in nightclub toilets. After underestimating how much they can drink for the millionth time, there will be people who can’t hold all their grog in anymore and bolt to the toilet and chuck up everywhere, often spewing around the toilet rather than in it! And, of course, there’s the matter of those who go clubbing to find a looker to fool around with, and if those people can’t wait until they are in the backseat of a car or in a motel room, then the nightclub toilet will just have to do! While big enough for two people wanting a cubical romp, the male(s) involved won’t have much room to shoot out their unborn children and it will probably land on the floor or toilet seat, making the toilets even more unhygienic than before!
If you think this topic couldn’t get any more gross, consider those who snort cocaine off these very same toilet seats! They’ve just snorted up peoples germs from peeing, shitting, puking and even fucking! (Imagine someone snorting coke and accidentally snorting up some guy’s jizz!). So yeah, nightclubs toilets are filthy.
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