Some people, it comes naturally. Others… well, a bit of alcohol always helps loosen them up. There’s always some classic dancers that make me have a little giggle on the dance floor. Are you one of them?
Spaghetti Arms
Maybe you’ve had a bit too much to drink and you can no longer feel your arms. Or maybe your body is just getting real loose. Spaghetti arms people just let their arms go with the flow and swing around their body. However, you look like an idiot. And buddy, don’t be laughing at me when I mimic you. You obviously don’t know what you look like.
Shoulder Bounces
The shoulder bounces look like something is trying to escape upwards out of their shoulders. They might step from side to side, but if you’re only moving your shoulders, you’re looking stiff. There’s only one place where people like a stiffy and it’s not on the dance floor. (Or you know, maybe it is, each to their own).
Hip Dippers
Yes girl, I see you over there dipping your hips and dropping it a little bit. That smile to go with it. Yep, you’re looking good. As long as it matches with the music and it doesn’t look like you’re trying to squat or you have a hip replacement.
Jumping Beans
Mate, I’m trying to dance here. If you wanna jump, buy a trampoline.
Couples Galore
I find it really cute when couples dance together and spin each other round, add a little salsa and shake their booties. Just not on the packed dance floor where they think they deserve more space than others because they can pull out some rehearsed partner moves. Either find your own space where it isn’t ridiculously crowded or save it for the living room. This ain’t Dirty Dancing.
Tribal Dancing
This is a new breed of dancers that I’ve noticed recently. They hang their arms down like orangutans or make a trunk with their arm and dance around in a circle with friends. And yes, I’ve seen it more than once in different places. I’m just not sure anymore.
Dirty Dancers
You know the ones. They’re slut dropping on their guy and rubbing his crotch. I hope you’re not one of them.
And I have come to the conclusion that everyone else just dances normally, heaving their body to the beat of the bass.
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