A big FYI before you read this, I don’t think girls would do anything for a drink. Not at all, I don’t think you could ever really buy a girl with a drink. If you want the cookie your going to have to try a little harder. Shoes maybe, drink no. That’s why I am supplying you with this list to denote the things that girls would actually do for one. Secondly
Wanna feel badass and hardcore this weekend? Yes, of course you do, who wouldn’t. Well you’re going to have to really commit, just dressing like a thug isn’t going to cut it, you have to go the whole nine yards. Smoke a lot, getting a black eye before hand wouldn’t hurt either. You have to have a big finish too, to seal the deal. Being escorted
So everybody knows who Ronnie Ortiz-Magro is yeah? Oh come on, “staaaappp ittt raaahhnnn, yaaarrr trraaamaaatiiizziinngg mmeee raaahhnnn.” Sound familiar? Well get excited because the man himself is here all the way from Jersey on his first Australian tour…without Sammi!
On your marks Melbournians, this weekend is going to be hectic! Were talking pre Future parties, post Future parties, and all the other kinds of parties I’m sure your going to partake in (wink wink). Lucky it’s a long weekend and hopefully the only labor you’re going to be doing is dealing with the hangover Monday morning.
For those who are still innocent and pure, the walk of shame is the next morning’s unavoidable journey home after a one-night stand, sorry to be the one to corrupt you. If you’re thinking, what’s the big deal?
“Hi! This is reality calling. Just thought I’d let you know that train wreck your looking at is actually your Uni timetable. You don’t have Fridays off, you need to save your money to pay your car registration, you still haven’t done your tax return and your university doesn’t believe in public holidays. Don’t despair, Easter is on
Sometimes there are just not enough hours in the day to fit in all of our commitments, obligations and necessities and comfortably transition from the ‘professional’ us to the ‘party’ us. And sometimes you find yourself without 5 minutes to spare to prepare yourself for a change of set, especially us, the sought after and in demand individuals that we are.
Alcohol, your real life ‘get out of jail free’ card. What a blessing it is to be able to act on whatever stupid or socially unacceptable whim that comes into your mind and be happily ignorant of any impending consequences. The Mecca of such activities, bars and nightclubs, when you think about it, really are social ‘grey areas’ when it comes to normally
So many 90’s rappers and pop singers have sung longingly about girls who ignore these genuine, famous, successful guys who are totally into them and just keep staying with the wrong guys despite their selfishness and inconsiderate character. Whether the members of those bands got their girls is a mystery, but in the process they have, maybe inadvertently….
Hey, look at you. You survived Valentines Day, way to go. Being able to sneer at cute couples wandering around the streets and frequenting your favourite restaurants and holding hands between courses, those were good bits. Still feeling acutely single at the end of it, that’s lame.