Some guys just have it-a severely warped wanky complex. It’s comprised of acting before thinking, even if that’s trying to emulate something we dreamed about, or saw Nick Giannopoulous do. The bottom line is, unless the girl is blind-drunk, it will not work!
If you find yourself doing these things on a regular basis, you have been possessed by the spirit of an unattractive wanker…
You walk around a bar/nightclub like you are The Incredible Hulk’s stunt double.
You are always guaranteed of spotting one or two gym-junkies on a night out on the town. However, for the most part, these blokes will not dance. Instead, they will be deluded into thinking they are still at the gym-only with a drink in their hand, instead of a dumbbell-and the mirrors have been substituted by all the women there. It’s clearly an extreme form of narcissistic exhibitionism, which is going to leave many girls thinking that you are an arrogant wanker who’s in love with yourself. Girl aren’t blind-they’ll notice the guns. Nobody likes a show off.
You cannot keep your hands to yourself once you get a look from a member of the opposite sex.
If you are one of those wanky blokes who thinks you are in after receiving a quick glance from a girl, please refrain yourself in the future, or risk looking like a dickhead or copping a slap. Unfortunately for you, your pheromones have not just attracted you a potential mate. There should always be a nice chat later on-or perhaps a quick dance to decipher if she really is into you or just looked into your direction. Nevertheless, don’t rush or don’t assume. Your intentions will be as obvious as dog’s balls.
You choose to acquaint yourself with mates who are just as bad, or worse, of a wanker, as you are.
Friends can play a major influence on how you behave in social environments. Hanging around wankers, and conforming to their wanky ways, will not impress too many people. Instead, they’ll stay away.
You think saying something along the lines of, “Hey, baby. You wanna go somewhere and do it?” is the best pick-up line, of all time.
It’s 2012 and society is paranoid about STIs and HIV. So do you honestly believe that a girl in their right mind is going to fall for that kind of shit? If you really wanna get a root-go to a brothel. It’s mutual there and if you’re lucky, you won’t catch anything.
You’ll get pissed and start a punch-on with a random, for any piss-poor excuse, just to prove how tough you are.
“Wannnkerrr, smashhh!” is what many on-lookers will be thinking when they see this happening. Not only will you look like the biggest trouble-making wanker there, but your hopes of impressing any female, with your Neanderthal techniques, will be dashed out the door. And your night will be over, and back to your cave you’ll go to contemplate how everything wankerish let you down.
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