After spending a quarter of the night’s cash on a taxi ride into the venue, you’re faced with the testing teeth of a door bitch, asking ever so kindly for whatever’s left over. The twenty cent piece you receive in return for a stamp on the wrist seems to taunt you with the smiling face of your Royal Highness. It’s time to take action.
Here are three ways to fight the entree fee, and spend the money on what you initially intended to.
The grouped up glide
When trying to avoid a disappearing act from within your wallet, it’s best to think like those dollar bills and vanish. Setting yourself amongst a large group of people paying in pairs, triples or with big notes means a fake giggle and a ‘grouped up glide’ through the entry point can mean avoiding a cash exchange all together.
The flirt and flee
While door bitches are generally, you guessed it- female, it doesn’t mean that you can’t woo the pants off them (perhaps literally) even if you are a girl yourself. Spend a few minutes making suggestive conversation during the bill exchanges of other paying patrons. If she’s into that sort of thing she’ll let you in for free. If she’s straight as the bench she’s sitting at you’re sure to have scared her so much that she’ll forget the pending cash transaction all together.
The “I’ll be back”
It’s definitely not recommended to state the above line in an Arnold Schwarzenegger inspired accent, but treating the situation with as much confidence as The Terminator himself can pay off in the long run. Flex those biceps, hold your head up high and announce that “you’ll be back” after withdrawing some cash from the ATM inside the venue. And of course, unlike Arnie, never do come back.
Leave a Comment